下面是学习啦小编整理的经典趣味英语笑话，欢迎大家阅读!

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经典趣味英语笑话：太黑了，看不见

After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."

晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?” 过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。”

经典趣味英语笑话：One real man

The ruler of an ancient kingdom wanted to disprove the statement that the men of his domain were ruled by their wives. He had all the males in his kingdom brought before him and warned that any man who did not tell the truth would be punished severely(严格地，严厉地).

Then he asked all the men who obeyed their wives" directions and counsel(劝告，建议) to step to the left side of the hall. All the men did so but one little man who moved to the right.

It"s good to see, said the king, that we have one real man in the kingdom. Tell these chickenhearted(胆小的) dunces(傻瓜) why you alone among them stand on the right side of the hall.

Your Majesty, came the reply in a squealing voice, it is because before I left home my wife told me to keep out of crowds.

一个真正的男子汉

古代有一个国王，他想证明他领土内的男人并非像人们传说的那样，受到老婆的管制。他把王国里所有的男人都召到跟前，警告说，哪个男人胆敢不说实话，就会受到严厉的惩罚。

然后，他叫所有听从妻子的命令和意见的男人都走向大厅的左侧。所有的男人都站到了左侧，只有一个小个子男人站到了右侧。

国王说：看到我们国家里还有一个真正的男子汉，真是令人高兴。告诉这些胆小的笨蛋，为什么在他们当中只有你一个人站在大厅的右侧。

陛下，那人尖声地回答：因为在我出门之前，我老婆告诉我不要扎堆。

经典趣味英语笑话：万能的圣诞老人并非啥都知道

As a little girl climbed onto Santa"s lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?"

The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: "Didn"t you get my E-mail?"

一个女孩爬到圣诞老人的膝盖上，圣诞老人例行公事的问：“今年圣诞节你想要什么呢?”

孩子瞪大眼睛惊讶的望着圣诞老人一分钟都没讲话，然后喘着气说到：“你没收到我的电子邮件吗?(我想要什么都写上面了，万能的圣诞老人咋能不知道捏)”

经典趣味英语笑话：借公牛一用

Once upon a time, there lived a rich man, but he didn"t know any words.

One day, one of his friends wanted to borrow an ox from him, so he wrote a note and asked his servant to take it to this rich man.

After the servant gave the note to the rich man, he pretended to be reading it and after a while, he said, "OK, I know. Go and tell your master, I"ll go myself shortly.

从前，有个人很富有，但他不识字。

一天，他的一位朋友想向他借一头公牛，便写了个条，让仆人送到富人那里。 仆人把条子给了富人。富人便假装看了一会儿，然后说道：“好啦，我知道了。回去告诉你的主人，我马上自己过去。”

经典趣味英语笑话：What Color什么颜色

What Color什么颜色

An impoverished graduate student at Clemson University in South Carolina, I was excited when my father informed me that he had bought me a car. Hardly able to contain my enthusiasm, I asked Dad the typical questions: "What kind is it? Does it have a stick shift? Does it have a tape deck?"

"It"s a 1982 Toyota," he replied. "It"s a four speed, and, yes, it has a tape deck . " Pleased, I asked what color it was.

"Well, " he said uncomfortably, " which part?"

作为南卡罗莱那州克莱姆森大学的一个本科生，我囊中羞涩，当我父亲告诉我他为我买了辆车时，我甚是激动。我几乎控制不住我的热情，问了爸爸几个关键问题：“什么车?有没有手排挡?有没有磁带舱?”

“是1982年产丰田车，”他回答说，“四速，还有，是的，有磁带舱。”我甚是高兴，又问是什么颜色的。

“哦，”他很不舒服地说，“你指哪一部分?”

经典趣味英语笑话：Akimbo (叉腰)

Just like most of other kids, aged two Emilia didn" t like washing hands──she" s always wiping the dirt off hands on her clothes. One day I accompanied her to have fried cicadae(蝉). Habitually she rubbed her grease fingers on her real silk short gown. I held back (阻挡) her from doing it: " What do you want to do?" She was immediately on to (意识)her blame, replied at ease(从容): " I" m akimbo."

像大多数别的小孩一样，两岁艾咪丽雅不爱洗手，吃东西弄脏手，随便在身上一抹就得了。一天我正陪她吃炸知了，她手上的油多了，便习惯地往真丝小褂子上蹭，我阻止道：“你想干什么?”她马上意识到问题所在，从容答道：“我叉腰。

经典趣味英语笑话：唯有我是司机

A short young man was running behind a bus which was full of passengers. But the bus still ran at a great speed.

"Stop, stop, " a passenger looked out of the window, and shouted at the young man, "you can"t catch it ! "

"I must," the young fellow said, out of breath, "because I"m only driver of the bus.

在一辆满载乘客的公共汽车后面，一位小个子青年在奔跑着。气车仍在高速前进。 “停下吧，”一位乘客把头伸出窗子，对小个子喊道，“你追不上的!”

“我必须追上，”小个子气喘吁吁地说，“我是司机!